It has been a month now since Emily passed away. My memory is still full of her life. I am still seeing her sitting, sleeping on the Sofa, laying on bed, slowly walking up stairs. On the other hand, I don't want to talk much about Emily. Each time I talked, it would make me sad and make me cry. I really hope that time can roll back to the college days, or to the days when Audrey was just born. Qiyun were so nice, I could never forget.

I was feeling sad; I also felt defeated.  Not only Emily lost her battle to cancer; I am also another loser. I have tried very hard to help Emily on this battle, but we lost. Because Emily and I did not tell other people about her illness. The only people knew about her disease were living quite far away, like Emily's mom or my brother. So Emily and I like two person team working together against this disease. Now one person is gone. I am the only person left to face the defeat.

Purpose of life

I was reading recent Reader Digest. One article talked about Dalai Lama. Dalai Lama was asked what was the purpose of life. Dalai Lama said it is for happiness. Then he said happiness is too simple an answer. The more complex answer is about how to pursue happiness.